My dark fantasies are disturbing. I think it is because I know I am a worthless whore who deserves to die. I wish I was dead every day. Last week, I came very close to dying. You would think that I would be embracing life from my near-death experience, but I am not. I am trying to recreate it. I was in the bathtub, listening to music and drinking wine. My son, who hates me came in and was angry at me. I wouldn’t give him money. He started yelling at me then grabbed my radio and through it in the tub with me. My life flashed before my eyes as I prepared to die. Then I remembered it was a battery radio, so I didn’t get electrocuted like in some bad thriller movie. My son was sad he didn’t kill me. Honestly, so was I. I have been bathing daily with a radio nearby that is plugged in and not on batteries, but he has not returned to kill me. I lack the guts to do it myself, but I bet you don’t do you. What is your taboo role play? Do you think you could kill me in a painful and gruesome way?
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