Oh my God, I had the most exciting call the other day. This dude called me with some pretty dark fantasies, but they were so hot that I just went right along with it and had the most amazing orgasm. What were his fantasies, you ask? Well, he told me that he wanted to cook me instead of cooking a Christmas ham. He said that I’m a big enough pig that I could feed him and his entire family, no problem. I asked if he was going to slice my throat first so I wouldn’t suffer while he roasts me in the oven. I was shocked at his answer.
He said that of course he was going to take my life before roasting me because he was going to have to cook me in pieces. He told me that he was going to roast a thigh for the holiday dinner he was having, but that he was saving my head for himself. I was shocked by listening to him tell me how he was going to put my head in the oven with a big apple in it while I was baking. If you want to hear the rest of this dark fantasy, give me a call. It’s probably too gory to post here. Oink oink.
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